Second Life: Having a Child in the Digital Age

Amanda Hess's Second Life: Having a Child in the Digital Age is the book every parent in 2026 needs to read. Part memoir, part investigative journalism, Hess chronicles the birth of her first son while interrogating the vast informational ecosystem that surrounds modern childrearing — from fertility apps and prenatal genetic tests to gender-reveal videos and the algorithmic gaze that tracks children before they can even speak.

The Informational Excess of Parenting

Hess identifies the "digital footprint paradox" — the tension between the tools that promise to make parenting safer and the surveillance infrastructure they construct. The Washington Post called Second Life "exceptional" in its attempt to make sense of the informational excess of modern childrearing. Hess lenses out from her personal experience with a reporter's gimlet eye, investigating how the "circle of life" has become inextricably bound to the "circle of data."

Core Principles for Digital-Age Parents:

• Data Sovereignty: Understanding what information your child generates before birth — and who owns it.
• Algorithmic Parenting: Recognizing when tech tools support parenting versus when they replace it.
• Digital Legacy: The long-term implications of a child's pre-verbal digital footprint.

The ChildCost Verdict

Second Life is a funny, harrowing, and essential guide to raising a child in a world where every milestone is tracked. Hess gives parents the data and the perspective to make intentional choices about their child's digital life.